What are you hiding from?

Hey! What’s the mask for?  Good question.  Are you hiding yourself?  From yourself?From what?  Your feelings?  Are you hiding from personal conflict?  I was/am.

Here’s where it gets confusing.   I was told to take my mask off.  “Let the real you SHINE!”  “Stop taking ‘guff’ from people.”   “Give attitude back!”  For me that’s been a slow process.  I’ve only recently started to “give back” in terms of speaking my mind, letting people know what was and wasn’t appreciated.   It has really been empowering!  WARNING!  I WILL BE DOING MORE OF THAT!

I hide from my own reality.  I try not to when think about my health issues although I am taking care of them.  There’s a corner of my head I retreat to.  I come back when I feel safe.  I try not to think about mortality, although I know one day I’ll have to.  Can’t “do” you right now. Gotta “do” me.

I’ve learned that I’ve been at war with MYSELF!  “Did I say that right?”  “Did I do this right?”  “Could I have done that better, if so how?”  ARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!  “STOP THINKING ADE!”  “NOTHING IS WORTH THIS MUCH STRESS!”

I use humor as a mask and an escape.  I use it to maintain my sanity.  If I didn’t, I might be somewhere I don’t like right now.  I’m frustrated as much as anybody.  I can’t help my feelings.

Yes I hide.  Do you, if so what from?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Author: ademey1hotmail.com

I live on a horse ranch. I'm good at what I do and what I do is be ME!

2 thoughts on “What are you hiding from?”

  1. Once again, very thought provoking. It is difficult to “face” who we are sometimes. It is so much easier to hide but can be toxic to our self-esteem!

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

    Liked by 1 person

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